I decided to read this book, because I am married, and enjoy reading about other marriages and how families navigate life together. Like Khadeen and Devale, my husband and I met when we were very young, so this also piqued my interest. In addition, I too, am raising 4 boys. We Over Me, was a great read, it did not disappoint.
We Over Me
Let’s get into it…
First, I appreciate how the text takes us from the beginning of The Ellis relationship to the present, and everything in between. There is something so relatable about that young love, where emotions and hormones are high and nothing else matters. Not even the disapproval of family or friends. That young budding love is what fairytales are made of. If you can hold on to that feeling, and pursuit of your significant other, you will have a great foundation for success.
Khadeen and Devale tell their story, from both of their perspectives. Sharing how they felt as individuals and as a couple. Being sure to remind readers that doing life with another person is not easy, but it is worth it. This choice gives the readers insight into how partners can share in the same experience and have differing perspectives. This does not mean that one side is right or that the other side is wrong. Simply, it is a reminder for both parties to have empathy and seek understanding. Learning to acknowledge others experiences is so validating. And sometimes all we need as humans is to be heard.
The Ellis’s also divulge taking space from one another early in their relationship, to figure out what they really wanted. As we grow as individuals sometimes there is a need for space, in order to gain clarity and perspective. This level of honesty and transparency is top tier.
Khadeen and Devale detail a relationship full of work, and renewed strength. It is profound when Devale shares his journey as a parent and describes how watching his wife bring life into the world changed him for the better. I found this to be encouraging. We all need that assurance that tough times will get better, and a partner willing to put in the work to become a better human, is worth having.
The Ellis’s do a great job at not pushing their way of doing life on their readers. Yet they are effective at telling a story that is thought provoking and inspirational.
My take aways…
1. Relationships take work. As you grow separately, you will need to work to stay connected and keep unity.
2. Place your marriage above all.
3. Do not be afraid to ask for help, especially while raising children.
4. Set boundaries in all your relationships.
5. There are many who are going through the exact same things that you are, you are not alone.
6. Build your community of support.
7. It is never too late to elevate and create change.
2 responses to “What We are Reading: We Over Me By Khadeen and Devale Ellis”
I watch them via social media and love how relatable they are! I am not married but love how they navigate their relationship, showing all aspects and not just the glammed up version of what people think it is. I would read this book based off of your POV and what the family stands for as a whole.
They are so relatable, and open about their ups and downs. Relationship books also help before getting into relationships too.